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“Maybe I should google the possible risks and side effects of anesthesia in children.”

That’s the thought that popped into my decidedly unhelpful brain last Thursday night. I was lying in the dark on my daughter’s bedroom floor, waiting for her to fall asleep. She was having a hard time for the same reason I was; my husband and I would be taking her to the hospital first thing in the morning for a minor surgical procedure.

It was minor in that it took less than 15 minutes to finish, and the risks of the actual surgery were quite low. But it was still surgery, which meant getting up early, schlepping a tired and hungry child to the hospital, hurrying up and waiting, and, of course, anesthesia. They had to put her under, and that’s the part that had me worried. Between both of our daughters, my husband and I had been through this particular song and dance five times before, and knowing that my child is going to be anesthetized never gets easier. It totally stresses me out. Every time.

I wasn’t the only one. My daughter was also anxious about it, which is why I was sprawled out on her rug, waiting for her to fall asleep. I was trying stay focused on my breathing, but my brain wasn’t interested. Hence, the suggestion to head on over to Dr. Google.

A few years ago, I would have fallen for that crap. I would have whipped out my laptop and gone to town the minute my daughter was asleep. I would have read everything available about all of the terrible things that can happen to children under general anesthesia. I would have obsessively researched the risk factors, desperate to know that my daughter didn’t have any. I would have read and read, even as I was freaking out.

You can read the rest of this story about my freak out over at my PsychCentral.com Mindful Parenting blog.